Happy Birthday, Andy

A well-planned & executed surprise despite the minor setbacks along the process. Thanks to a bunch of awesome people that this night successfully marked the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun of an awesome someone.


Happy Birthday,
please keep your hands out the cookie jar.

xx

Anyone else but you

I am finally gaining real momentum of my relationship until things have to take a dramatic turn. At first, things are not going smoothly, all I wanna do is just throw my hands up in the air and fret that this thing isn't going to work out, just like all the other past ones. Conversely, you never give up, you embrace any conflict that erupts, because working through it together is going to bring the two of us even closer together. Baby, you are right. Sometimes we have to argue before we can find that common ground.

Remember the time...

Finally we have came to a place where we can get a sense of the true value we bring to each others life. It's wonderful to feel like we bring the best out of each other for once, and the two of us are getting closer in a whole new level.

We took the time to get away for a while and reminded ourselves how well we fit together. Took a trip together to the beach and boy, we never had so much fun.

Remember, we all stumble, every one of us.
That's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand.

When the girlfriend was away...

...the little bitch came out to play

So you said it, to him while I wasn't around.
Sneak behind me without a sound.
Dare to pen it but not the guts to admit.
I can read you like a book, now look...

your existence is like a dark gray cloud blotting my sunny skies
the good news is that you're just one little cloud
You're easily ignored. Your little trick is passe.
Mum is the word. Eavesdroppers abound.
Don't wear your heart on your sleeves
You are shameless nonetheless which explains.
Don't go getting delusions of grandeur.
I find you very pathetic, clinging on to whatever dribble of delusions you can convince yourself and is abusing it to fill your land of make-believe with little trophies to ensure you don't die of self-denial and insecurities.
Spit on you for calling me a bitch.

He doesn't fancy you.
Played with your heart, you set yourself on fire.
Holding on to that trace of expired hope, I think you need to try harder.
You're not young anymore to love attention.

Pft.

Look who is talking here.
Shame on you, for being 27 and allowing a 22 year old girl to feel embarrassed for you. There are many ways to being a bitch - that doesn't mean you can't do it with class.


There is no battle for the winner is obvious.

Middle Management

Image via Stephany Yaya Sungkharisma @ on your mark get set go

Lately I have been focusing on setting aside time to hunker down and just hang with folks I care the most about right now. Those who know me best and those who always able to say the right words that will put a smile on my face. Those old close friends of mine whom I tell them my tale with only my eyes. Silence make the real conversations between friends. Not the saying but the never needing to say is what counts. I am blessed to have you all through those good and bad times. I have just been told last night that I need to adopt a more analytical attitude, especially when it comes to dealing with people I don't like. If she rubs me the wrong way, so what? She doesn't have an impact on my life, so skip past her and never look back. If she is nothing nice, why bother giving her the power more than she deserves over my life and my relationship? My time and energy should only be devoted to those who bring out the best in me.

Train of complaints

Mom and I. The two of us have been bickering a lot lately. However, when I see through our bluster I know that deep down inside we really love and respect each other. Our words carried a lot of weight with each of them. Why do we need to hurt each other like this? You are always not easy to please, and forever I feel like I can never do right in your eyes. But I am already giving too much, working too hard, and caring more than I need to. It's time to take stock of things. I don't mind working so hard to read your mind long as it is worthwhile. All these constant power struggles are not really the way I want to live my life with you. When I take another look at the argument we often had, I quickly see how the rift was caused by each person being too rigid and unwilling to see the other side of things. I want to keep us both happy but I cannot do it alone. I need your help to make this work.

xx

I don't mean to be deemed as being flaky. I wanna put things in motion. I don't want to make empty promises. But I still have a long way to go...and I've only just began.

I am still learning...

xx

"Amplifying the volume of romance in your life can be easy if you admit that romance doesn't just relate to a love relationship. Romance exists wherever there is beauty, wherever there is music, and wherever there are two people laughing at a private joke. You need to adjust your vision to include a wider view of what is romantic. Then, you will start to see romance a lot more often. Cherish the way you relate to the world. Smell the roses. You're rushing around too much to notice the magic."

Today I miss you

You taught me how to be my own lover before anyone could be mine.
I know I have been trying to trick or bribe you into giving me more of your heart - loves doesn't work that way


The only trick to do it right is to ask for what I want
but it is not necessary that I would get it.
The world doesn't revolve around me.

Walking with a ghost

Ghosts from the past have a funny way of sneaking behind our back and wander in when least expected. Some people are pretty adamant that once their door is shut, it should remain that way. It's somewhat redundant to be petty over things that happened ages ago. I don't. I enjoy the past sashaying into my live and those around me, one of the many reasons for the demise of my previous relationships. I am a provoker myself. I like stirring up certain things or people that others had rather not remember. When the fact that people or situations that are toxic to life should remain shunned out from it. Well, in my case, I'd deliberately let anything or anyone unpleasant waltz in on my life and on those who are close to me. I am also capable of bringing the ghosts from the past of those I love, back and haunt them. Why ostracize people from your life once the door is closed? These people or situations are somewhat part of you, no matter how much you despise it(Hate is such a strong word, innit?).

However, this time, I've learned. A vow of silence towards situations or people to give myself a peace of mind and not to contaminate my relatively comfortable life for the moment. You can doubt me, I am giving you the full benefit of doubt. For the record, it is good to sever ties to prevent a vicious spiral of actions. It is much more pleasant to be cold and selfish sometimes than to rage in a sea of malice-laced-superficiality. Forget the "just let it go and be civil", I know you too well that you are just like a bull in my little china shop, highly and likely to cause some breakage and possibly even some harm. I hate the aggressive energy you possessed in your whole life. I'd rather not invite any sort of confrontation with you like I had previously done whereby all the efforts are in vain as you obviously have a chip on your shoulder. It amuses me sometimes that how people have the tendency to forget the things that have inflicted on others negatively. I am not saying that I'm excluded from such guilt of ignorance, I too, have the benefit of reveling in such temporary amnesia.

Drop everything and remove myself from any explosive situations, I'd pretty much only speak if spoken to. That's just me now.